Inclusive Sex Ed Essential Guide

Sexual Education is an intersectional(1) social justice issue(2) because identities inevitably intersect when we learn about our bodies. As young people learn about their bodies, they start to understand (perhaps for the first time), the way their multiple identities impact their experiences. These identities might include, gender, sex, sexual orientation, presence or absence of a disability, as well as the way the body is racialised, shaped, sized etc. All of these elements of individuals’ bodies will impact their experiences; and sex education is where children and young people begin to navigate the space of learning about their bodies. 

Comprehensive(3) and inclusive sexual education(4) is necessary, not only for the safety and wellbeing of those young people who are more vulnerable (or do not fit into the heteronormative(5), cis-gendered(6), disability-free and racially dominant majority categories). Comprehensive and inclusive sexual education is crucial for all young people so that we can change the culture in which we as a society view and discriminate against certain kinds of bodies.  

Sexuality 101: Sexual Orientation Terminology

Straight/Heterosexual(6): attracted to people of a different gender

Gay/Lesbian(6): attracted to people of the same gender 

Bi/Bisexual(6): attracted to people of the same and at least one other gender

Queer(6): an umbrella term that can describe people of any sexual orientation or gender. A reclaimed term, previously used in the derogatory, queer usually isn’t used to describe, straight and cis-gendered people, but there are exceptions.

Pansexual(6): can be attracted to a person of any gender

Gray-A / Demisexual(6): only experiencing sexual attraction after a close connection is formed

Asexual(6): little or no sexual attraction. People who are asexual may or may not feel emotional attraction.

Sex, Sexual Orientation, and Gender

Sex, sexual orientation and gender are three different concepts, although they are often confused or used interchangeably. Sex(7) refers to a person’s biological categorisation as female, male, or intersex. It is based on a person’s chromosomes, hormones, genes, sex organs, and secondary sex characteristics. Gender(7) is how a person identifies and expresses themselves in the world, as a man/boy, woman/girl, both, neither, or something else. What it means to be a man/boy or woman/girl is socially and culturally constructed and changes over time and space. Gender is not the same thing as sexual orientation(8). Sexual orientation is who a person is attracted to. Gender is who a person is. To read more about sex and gender be sure to check out our free gender resources at: www.eager.network/gender

Inclusive Sex Education

Traditional sex education is highly exclusionary(9), normalising those who are straight, cis-gendered, not living with any disabilities, and in some cases, white.  This not only excludes essential information for many young people, but also serves to create a society in which understandings of sex, gender, sexual orientation, and bodies are heteronormative, ableist, transphobic, white-centric, and marginalise many people in a host of ways(10).

For resources on inclusive sex education for people living with disabilities(11), check out:

Sexuality Education for Students with Disabilities by Center for Parent Information & Resources; &

Sexual Education Resources by Respect Ability

For information about antiracist sex education(12) check out:

Sex ed is a vehicle for racial justice. By Zach Eisenstein and SIECUS: Sex Ed for Social Change; &

Sex Education in School and at Home Needs an Anti-Racist Focus by Varuna Srinivasan on Parents.com

For queer inclusive sex education(4) tips, check out this quick video:

   Sex Ed For LGBTQ Youth - Five Ways To Make Sex Ed More Queer Inclusive! By Nadine Thornhill

Queer Inclusive Sex Education Key Points:

(Tips below are from the Nadine Thornhill video above, with some additional information and commentary added by Eager Network)

Tip 1: Gender neutralise body terminology.

Separate gender from anatomy and biology:

• Instead of saying, ‘Girls have vulvas and boys have penises,’ say, ‘Some people have vulvas and some people have penises.’

• Instead of saying, ‘When girls menstruate...’ say, ‘when people who menstruate get their periods.’

• Instead of saying, ‘boys/men ejaculate,’ say, ‘people who ejaculate.’

• People with ovaries, people with testicles, people with periods, people with breasts, etc.

Tip 2: Include intersex bodies:

Intersex is when a body falls outside of the sex binary. Intersex can present in many ways…

• It may mean male anatomy on the outside but female anatomy on the inside (ovaries and testicles) or vice versa.

• It may mean that genitalia are a combination of male and female, such as a scrotum that is empty and resembles labia, or labia that are closed and resemble a scrotum, a penis without a urethra opening at the tip or a vagina without a vaginal opening.

• Sometimes intersex traits are not visible from the outside and might go undiagnosed for many years. In these cases, intersex traits can be chromosomal, hormonal, or in secondary sex characteristics (developmental changes during puberty)

Intersex people are often completely left out of the conversation in sex ed. Although a minority of people, intersex people do exist; so talking about sex as if it were binary in sex education is exclusionary and inaccurate. Comprehensive sex education is not binary. Not everyone fits that mould.

• Instead of saying, ‘people who have vulvas have ovaries,’ say, ‘most people who have vulvas have ovaries, but not all do.’

• Instead of saying, ‘people who have penises have testes,’ say, ‘most people who have penises have testes, but not all do.’

• (Both intersex and in trans inclusive)

Tip 3: Include Asexual people:

 Asexual(6) people feel little or no sexual desire. Some asexual people still might have consensual sex for other reasons than desire. Asexual people might also feel particularly confused about their lack of desire if asexuality is left out of sex ed.

Tip 4: Explain that sex is more than penis and vagina sex:

Teach beyond penis/vagina sex, especially in relation to safe sex. This is important for young people who aren’t queer as well as those who are! Teach a comprehensive range of safe sex options:

• Separate safe sex to prevent unwanted pregnancy from safe sex to prevent STI’s.

• Include oral condoms along with discussions about penis condoms.

• Talk about the importance of STI testing including for gay and lesbian sex.

• Talk about the HPV vaccination

TIP 5: Create a safe way for queer students to get the information they need:

Either check in with queer students directly and ask if there’s anything you can do to make sure they get what they need from sex ed; or alternatively, create a system to ensure queer students can ask questions or share what they need from sex education without embarrassment:

• Anonymous questions drop-box

• Anonymous class feedback survey

• A designated member of staff who specialises in queer issues/sex ed, that students can come to with questions or for support.

Take the Conversation Further:

For how to discuss gender and intersectionality with young people check out this video:  

  #SaveSexEd​ - Gender For High School Students by Nadine Thornhill with guest Fae Johnstone (Twitter - @FaeJohnstone)

Key Terms Review:

Intersectional Social Justice Issue(2): a topic that involves the intersection of race, class, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, presence or absence of a disability and other identity markers which will influence people’s experiences

Comprehensive Sexual Education(3): Sex Education that is accurate and complete. Sex ed must be inclusive to be accurate and complete. Traditional sex ed has been exclusionary in that it takes certain normative standards for granted and excludes information pertaining to all who fall outside of dominant groups.

Heteronormativity(5): the belief that heterosexuality is the default, preferred, or normal mode of sexual orientation. It assumes the gender binary and that sexual and marital relations are most fitting between people of opposite sex.

Cisgender(6): Gender identity matches assigned gender/biological sex

Straight(6): a sexual orientation in which someone is attracted to people of the opposite sex/gender

Gay/Lesbian(6): a sexual orientation in which someone is attracted to people of the same gender

Bisexual(6): a sexual orientation in which someone is attracted to people of at least two genders.

Queer(6): an umbrella term that can describe people of any sexual orientation or gender. A reclaimed term, previously used in the derogatory, queer usually isn’t used to describe, straight and cis-gendered people, but there are exceptions.

Pansexual(6): a sexual orientation in which someone can be attracted to a person of any gender

Gray-A / Demisexual(6): a sexual orientation in which someone only experiences sexual attraction after a close connection is formed

Asexual(6): a sexual orientation in which someone has little or no sexual attraction and may or may not feel emotional attraction.

Sex(7): biological categorisation as female, male, or intersex, based on a person’s chromosomes, hormones, genes, sex organs, and secondary sex characteristics. In rare cases a person has a combination of male and female sex characteristics. This is called intersex.

Gender(7): Gender refers to the characteristics of women, men, girls and boys that are socially constructed.  This includes norms, behaviours and roles associated with being a woman, man, girl or boy, as well as relationships with each other. As a social construct, gender varies from society to society and can change over time

Sexual Orientation(8): a person’s identity in terms of what genders they are sexually attracted to

Inclusive Sexual Education(4): Inclusive sex education works to include LGBTQIA+ people, BIPOC/BAME(13) people, and those living with disabilities.  

Queer Inclusive Sexual Education(4): Specifically works to include gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, intersex, intergender, asexual, agender, or queer identifying people.  

Antiracist Sexual Education(12): Antiracist sex education seeks to provide equity in providing comprehensive sex education to BIPOC communities; to address white supremacists norms, culture and beliefs about bodies, to look at historic and current over-sexualisation, stereotyping and fetishizing of black women and the general sexual stereotyping, fetishization and stigmatization BIPOC generally; and to address black and other BIPOC specific sexuality issues, such as healthcare discrimination, access, etc.